Saturday, May 7, 2011

Did You Pull Your Vagina?

Last night, Tammy and I went to the movies to see "Something Borrowed". LOVED IT!!!!!!!!! (GREAT quote in the movie, hence the title of today's entry.) But, I think we need to review movie theatre etiquette. So, that is what today's blog is going to be discussing. And, as I seem to have come down with an icky stomach bug, this may be a shorter blog today. I even canceled my manicure appointment today. This, for anyone who knows me, is a HUGE indicator of just how not well I am feeling.(Big props to my Issac for making me toast and getting me Gatorade!)

Tammy and I arrived at the theatre. I got my Regal Club Card points awarded to me. (very crucial, as I earn free movie tickets, popcorn and pop) Tammy, however, was told the system was down and she couldn't get her points. We went to customer service because clearly, she was being lied to.  And, sure enough, they were able to give her the points she earned. After a quick stop at the concession stand, we headed to our theatre.  We were the first ones in and hardly anyone was coming in to join us, so it appeared that it would be a small crowd. I should know better than to say things out loud. I always curse myself.

As the theatre fills with groups of women arriving to join us for this chick flick, a group of pre-teen girls sits down in the row in front of us. Cool. A few minutes later, a woman comes in, alone. She asks the first girl if the seat next to her was taken, and then proceeds to sit down-right next to the girl, when there was another seat open on the aisle. Totally weird. The girl then repeats louder that there is going to be someone sitting there. So, the woman gets up and pushes past Tammy and me. The rest of our row was empty. On the chair next to me was my purse and Tammys' jacket. The woman asked me to move my stuff so she could sit RIGHT NEXT TO ME. WTF?????? The ENTIRE row was open. WHY did she feel the need to be so close to me. I am not a fan of people in general, so this was just yuck.  A few minutes later, her daughter arrives and sits next to her. A couple more minutes pass and the daughter tells her mom she's moving over a seat because "why are we sitting right next to these people?" EXACTLY. So the mother gets up, tells me I can put my stuff back (gee, thanks) and proceeds to move over so there is space between us. During the whole movie, this woman gasps and talks and makes sounds loud enough to wake the dead. She never shut up. On top of that, the girl in front of us refused to stop texting on her phone. She was doing it continuously for over an hour. Tammy finally had enough and became "that person" who told the girl it was annoying and to please stop it.

So, to review: if there are seats open in a movie theatre, you do not, under any circumstance, sit right next to a person. There is NO NEED for it. It's also rude if you are an exceptionally tall person to sit in front of a person if there are open seats. You block the view and it just isn't nice if, in fact, you have other options. Talking all throughout a movie is also a big no no. The people around you probably aren't all deaf. No one wants to hear your thoughts, opinions, guesses or assumptions about the movie. So, please, just shut it. I probably see a movie every week. So, yes, I have the protocol down better than other people who don't frequent a theatre as often as I do. But really? It's just common sense people. Put your thinking caps on before you leave the house.

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