Monday, May 5, 2014

A Girl and Her Boobs

I need new bras. It's that time again. I bought new ones in October.  They are past their prime.  If you ask any bra saleswoman she would most definitely agree.  They want you in there shopping anywhere between 2-4 times a year.  I'm lucky if I go twice a year.  It's stressful for me. I have to go and get measured. And, the bras aren't cheap. My girls are big.  The bras are expensive.  And, then when I am there, I always want new panties to match the new bras.'s rough.

I'll be honest, I do not hand wash my bras as recommended.  I do not put them in a lingerie bag inside the washing machine.  I do hang dry them though. Points for me! Perhaps, if I took better care of them, I'd get more wear and tear out of them.  But the saleswoman tells me to buy them more often than I do anyway so who knows.  And I tell her that I most definitely use a lingerie bag to wash them. This way I don't have to buy the new one she's always trying to throw onto my tab.  It's like lying to the dentist about flossing your teeth. You tell them you do it all the time but they know you are lying.  And, the bra saleswoman can tell how I wash my bra when we're standing together in the changing room, and I am lying to her face.

My girls and I have been together for 28 years now--that's right, 28 years. We have a very special relationship. They sprouted when I was 10 years old. Not little itty bitty bumps, but they just shot right out.  At that time, I didn't fully appreciate them. I hated them.  I would walk around trying to cover them up.  I wore bigger sized shirts so boys wouldn't see them.  A saleswoman at the Gap once told me that by doing that, it just made me ( me in general) look bigger and that one day, I'd want to wear tighter fitting tops.  Boys made fun of me.  They called me "boom boom" at school.  Running the mile during gym class was pure torture for me. (Mostly, cause I do not run, but secondly, because they would be calling me that name while I attempted to run with my hands over my tits.)  I had no idea the relationship that the girls and I would have throughout the course of my life.  I have tried to take care of them. I try to keep them looking nice.  I did not breast feed my kids. (Not out of vanity, I was just a bottle feeder.) I have always worn an underwire bra, and I have tried to keep them in pretty looking bras. But, they are big. And, I am a bigger girl.  Victoria's Secret once kicked me out because the girls were too big for their goods.  Shopping for bras isn't a fun experience.

I have now found a store that makes pretty bras for big booby girls and the smaller booby girls all in one.  But, it can be an addiction.  When I go in and finally do get measured for bras, I want the over the shoulder boulder holder that also gives the girls some serious cleavage.  And, they make them!!!!!!!! When I shopped last time, I was able to be honest with my saleswoman.  I wanted a really good "t-shirt bra" but that would give a little sexiness. AND, I wanted a comfortable, cleavage shower offer.  She found me exactly what I wanted!!! I was so excited.  But, then which colors do I buy?? It was stressful. I wanted them all. But I couldn't sell one of my kids to buy them, because that would be wrong.  So, I bought 4 bras--which is a lot to buy at once, but I was excited.

I came out of the dressing room, and she asked me the dangerous question.  Did I need any panties?  Who doesn't ever need new ones? They feel so good. Men can buy a pack of 3 pair for $8.95. Women have to spend a fortune for panties. It really is unfair. So, if I go get new bras, I don't know if I have the self control to not buy myself new matching panties.  The funny part about all this is that I am not dressing for anyone other than myself.  Steve doesn't really offer an opinion on the undergarments.  And, we all know I don't go work out at a gym (or anywhere else) where anyone might see what the girls are sporting.  I like wearing beautiful bras because they make me feel good.  They make the girls feel special.

Maybe I'll go buy myself some new ones for Mothers Day..........