Three years ago today, I woke up to find out the air conditioning in my house wasn't working. It was about 80 degrees out that day and Andrew was playing in the All Star game. Oh...and Steve and I were getting married that afternoon. It's funny, how with a second marriage, second wedding, things are so different.
We all met at the Village Green to watch Andrew play in his big game. The weather was just beautiful...not a cloud in the sky. We all sat...getting some nice sun (some of us burnt) and some of the parents asked me when the big day was. I told them it was at 4pm. They all just stared at me and said, "TODAY??" Yes, today..at 4pm. Good thing the All Star Game was in the morning. Andrew's team won their game, which was awesome. Then, Natalie, our nanny for the summer (and Tessi's very dear friend) took the boys home. Tessi and I went off to get our hair and make up done. Oh..and the a/c guy came out to my house..on a Sunday...because I told him I was getting married and I couldn't dare get dressed without having cool air.
When you get married the first time, of course, you think it will be forever. But, as many of us know, nothing is forever. So...then comes wedding number 2. But, the difference, I think, is that you realize it is MARRIAGE number 2...not wedding number 2. So many brides get so wrapped up in the wedding, they lose sight of why there is a wedding...because there is a marriage following it. You have decided to build and share a life with this other person. It's not just about the flowers and the dress and the signature drink. (which back when I got married the first time, no one had at their weddings...thank you Bridezilla and Platinum Weddings for making everyone think they need one)
After the big wedding (or small intimate one), many couples jet off on a fancy, lovely honeymoon and vacation and relax. Or...take safari in Africa....or trek through Europe. Steve and I headed to the Westin for one night..the next day..had brunch at Walker Brothers and then headed to the dry cleaners to drop off our clothes. We ran a couple of errands and then went home. Very exciting stuff. Steve began to unpack his boxes and asked if I planned on giving him any more space for his clothes other than the one drawer he had had for a few months. Oh. I hadn't thought about that. So...we began shifting things around. This was stressful for me as I had sprawled all of my stuff throughout the closets and bedroom furniture for a few years. I managed to clear some space for him. Then, we had leftovers from our wedding reception at Wildfire with the kids and my parents. The next day, we went back to work and went on with our lives.
While it is a ton of fun to plan a wedding and shop for the dress and get super involved in planning every last detail, people need to think a little bit further. It isn't just about the wedding. It's about a journey you are about to embark on with this other person...the person you cannot imagine spending the rest of your life without. Does it really matter where you get married? Does it really matter who you are wearing or if you picked Jordan almonds or chocolate covered Oreos to go on each table at dinner? Truthfully, it doesn't--not in the scheme of things.
My favorite movie, "When Harry Met Sally" has so many wonderful quotes but my favorite one is this:
"I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
That is what a marriage is about-----starting the rest of your life as soon as possible. That is what Steve and I did. Originally, we were planning a much bigger wedding for October. After some thought, we realized there was no reason to wait. We wanted the rest of our lives to start as soon as possible. So, we opted for a much smaller wedding...we made it about the kids and us. Simon kept saying that day that "we" were getting married. And, that is exactly what "we" did. We became a family. It wasn't exactly the wedding we wanted....but, it didn't matter. What mattered was that we were beginning the rest of our lives. And, that is exactly what we did.
Happy Anniversary, babe!!!! xoxoxox