My Sunday Sermon

I want to start off by saying that today, on the 10 year anniversary of the 9.11 attacks, my heart is heavy and with all of those who suffered such a tragic loss that day. I wish everyone peace and comfort, hoping they can remember the good times with their loved ones.

Friends of ours welcomed their first child in the wee hours of the morning, a son. We are so very excited for them. And it just goes to show what so many of us who have suffered loss learn: Life goes on.

Last night, Steve and I went to the movies. We decided to go see "The Debt", with Helen Mirren.  We got in line to get our popcorn. When the man in front of us was done, he turned to walk away. All of a sudden, a woman ran up and began to order. It was as though Steve and I simply didn't exist.  I was ready to let her have it when Steve actually spoke up, much to my shock.  Steve is one of the most non-confrontational people I have ever met.  He never confronts anyone on anything ever!!!! He just turns the other cheek or brushes it off....he doesn't believe anything is worth getting upset over.  This woman goes ahead and proceeds to order her lemon ice when Steve interrupts her and lets her know we were there first and you don't just cut in front of a line.  She apologizes but goes on to tell us that the man that was in front of us was her husband.  Now. I have no idea if that was true. If it were, why didn't she walk over while he was still ordering? Why didn't she yell from wherever she was to say, "Hey, I'd like a lemon ice."  She offers to let us go ahead but Steve tells her to just finish up her order.  I stood there, fairly frozen because I had never witnessed this in almost 5 years of being together.  I mean NEVER. I was totally in shock that I didn't even acknowledge that Steve did this because I was so in awe of what I had witnessed.

When we got into the theatre, I swear it was as if the nursing home shuttled the patients for an outing. I never have seen so many seniors with walkers, canes and nurses in my life at a movie.  I think it's great they all got gussied up on Saturday night and went out. I was the youngest person in the theatre by 14 years...that is because Steve was with me.  But, next to me, he was the youngest person there by probably another 14 years-easily.  These people were so worried about saving seats, it was a show in itself to watch them doing it. They laid napkins on chairs. They laid walkers out, they hung jackets, they paced back and forth in front of seats and they yelled at people if they even glanced their way.  These people were hiking the stairs to get seats for this movie. And then, after all of this, they got shot down by the two a$$holes sitting in front of Steve and me.  We had to sit on the side of the theatre where there were 4 seats in a row. Steve and I took our usual aisle and seat next to it--which left room for another couple to join us...and another couple did. The shmos in front of us took seats 2 and 3, leaving one seat empty on either side of them. Now, I go to the movies often enough to know that these people were not saving seats for anyone. They were merely being shmucks and hogging a row.  They turned away countless people, walkers and all, by lying, claiming their "friends" were coming.  I know I have written about this before, but seriously, this drives me NUTS. (as do many other things, if you read any of my other blog entries)  These are the people that really don't have friends because they are so selfish and rude and inconsiderate!

Ok. Enough of my bitching. I have been sitting here for way too long avoiding what it is I need to be doing today--which is finishing picking out photos for Andrew's Bar Mitzvah montage. This is a very difficult task and I had no idea how time consuming and hard this would be. But, it won't get done if I don't do it.

So, on this day......give an extra hug to those you love and hold dear to your heart. Take a moment to think about all of those who can't....and remember how lucky and blessed you are.

Triple-Double

OREO has released a new cookie: they are calling it the Triple Double. It has 2 different fillings and 3 cookies. The people at the cookie company must be in cahoots with the people who make plus size clothing. Why on Earth would they invent a cookie that, although I am willing to bet tastes delicious, has to be absolutely horrible for us to be eating? All the news ever talks about is how this country is full of obese people. Women's magazine post tons of pictures with women's eyes blacked out so no one will know it is them in the "don't" picture, with their muffin tops popping out and they're back fat being pushed out.

Now, don't get me wrong. Who doesn't love an OREO? And, they make SO many varieties now that they probably cover all taste buds.  Why do I know this? Because in this house, the children can't all agree on one flavor OREO.  Everyone likes the traditional OREO. (this should end the blog. but marketing is everything.) There's Mint filled, Peanut Butter filled, Fudge covered, White Fudge covered, Reduced Fat,(who are they trying to fool?) Golden Oreos, Flip Flops (I think that's the name for the ones that have one yellow cookie and one chocolate) Double Stuff and lets not forget seasonal OREOS. Orange filled for Halloween, Red filled for Christmas, Yellow for Spring, and now.....they make Football shaped OREOS.  I am sure I am missing more. Oh yes---mini OREOS...they come in individual bags, or the bigger pack that looks like a container of chips. Lunch packs of OREOS, that come in multi pack boxes.

Why do I care about this? Truth is, I don't.  But I am now at Target at least 3 times a week re-stocking on groceries for the pre-teen boy that lives here.  I never can just walk into the store and buy what I need...I always have to wander around, aimlessly.  Given my present state of mind though, losing myself in the aisles of Target seems to help, if only for a few minutes.  That and the fact that I have had the hardest time finding the individual bags of the regular Goldfish.  Why is that??????? I found them at the 3rd Target I went to. Just like the OREOS, my kids don't agree on which Goldfish they like. They can't eat the color Goldfish. (um, they taste the SAME!) and heaven forbid I buy the Extra Cheddar Goldfish...all hell breaks lose since only 1 kid likes those.

This is what my life has come to: discussing OREOS and Goldfish. Does it matter? No. There are kids all over the world who have no food or don't know if or when there will be another meal. And my kids: they're picky over what shaped noodle they are eating, cause ya know, farfalle tastes different than rigatoni.

Again, I am not complaining about my kids. I am grateful for them. But so many things that they make an issue out of are just so trivial.  Then again, so is this blog entry.

Wow! It's been 7 WEEKS!!!!!!!

Hi everyone---if you are all still out there. It's been 7 weeks since I have posted anything. Life has been busy....and yet so not busy at the same time.

The boys and I took our giant trip out to Cooperstown for Andrew's baseball team. (Steve had to work.) It truly was an INCREDIBLE experience. It, essentially, is the field of dreams. They have built it and people come. My mom went with us (Thank G-d) and then we also spent some time with my bro and sis-in-law, Lance & Roya, which was really awesome.

There has been sadness. My BFF's son was diagnosed with a Wilm's Tumor. (childhood Kidney Cancer) He had surgery to remove the tumor and one kidney...surgery was a success. I had to leave a few days later for Cooperstown. While I was gone he went into renal failure. It was so hard to be away knowing what was going on at home. He pulled thru! Had radiation treatments and is undergoing chemotherapy now. He's back in the hospital right now due to some complications from some of the chemo. He is such a sweet, strong, brave boy. He is on our minds CONSTANTLY and always in our hearts. He will pull thru this and will come out better than ever. I know it. I just hurt for him, his sister and his parents. No parent should ever watch this happen to their child. It's gut wrenching and there's nothing we can do to make it better. It just makes me really sad.

School is back in session. I now have a 7th grader, a 5th grader and 2 -2nd graders.  It's pretty hard to believe. My boys are good boys. They are healthy and strong and for this I am grateful. At the same time, they are infuriating and frustrating and I am seriously losing my mind. No joke. Last week at Curriculum Night for the 2nd graders, I absolutely thought Simon had one teacher, when in fact I was completely wrong and needed another mother to remind me who his teacher was. I was mortified.  The next day, I ran into Issac's 4th grade teacher. She asked who Issac's 5th grade teacher was. I just sat there staring at her. For the life of me, I couldn't remember the woman's name. My excuse: that Curriculum Night for Issac was the following week. This woman just looked at me like I was insane and walked away.  I tell people this story. They retort with "you have 4 kids...it's too much to remember." I don't think that's it. I never forget these kinds of things. I don't know what's wrong.

I also have realized Andrew's Bar Mitzvah is now just over 10 weeks away. I feel somewhat prepared and somewhat terrified. I started going thru all of the pictures from the last 13 years for his montage. I just don't know where the last 13 years went. When I start to think of all that has occurred during that time, it just overwhelms me.

I also realized I am 35 years old and don't have a real career. I have jobs....and I love what I am doing right now. But. No career. Does it really matter? I never thought it did. Now--I'm not so sure. I feel kind of lost.

I'm also very tired of repeating myself non stop to the boys. No one listens or pays attention. I feel very taken for granted and taken advantage of.  (like most moms I know) Something needs to change. And, seeing as the kids most likely are not going to just shape up and start doing what's asked of them, maybe I need to change the way I handle them and the way I react to things.  I have a feeling no one is going to like it. It's too bad.  Don't get me wrong. I LOVE and ADORE my children.....but I am not a doormat or just here for their mere convenience.

Maybe I am starting a mid life crisis.....is it too early for one? Or, maybe it's early menopause? I know that can start around now. Whatever it is, I don't like it. I don't know how to make it better. I am trying...so far, nothing is working.

Back to Life!

Hi all! Long time, no writing. I got to start driving again last week and that's all I've been doing. I missed it SO very much and so happy to be able to again. I will never take that for granted again!

Not sure if I mentioned that we got a new puppy. She's an English Bulldog and we named her Bailey. She's adorable and so far, so good.  I have no idea what I am doing as far as training and raising a puppy but I am trying. For the most part, the kids are helping out. We'll see how long that lasts for.

My sister made her move to Nashville for her promotion. She's been gone for a week and it feels like forever. I miss her. Steve and I are going with our BF's to visit in September. Seems like a lifetime away. BUT--the boys get to go visit her in a month!!!! My mom is taking all of them for a weekend to go see her. They are SO excited!!!!

Our big Cooperstown trip is approaching and that should be interesting. Steve found out he cannot get out of work to go with us. So, it's just my mom, the boys and me for 12 days, in a car, traveling around. Good times. The team and their coaches stay on the property of the park in a cabin. So...each of the parents are responsible for bringing items the boys will need in the cabins. I am bringing a couple cases of water and a sign reminding the boys of what they need for the games before they leave each day, since no mom will be present. I bought foam board and giant letters and borders to make a really pretty sign.  Andrew laughed at me since I have ZERO artistic ability. My mom laughed saying that no one will read the sign anyway.

While at Target yesterday, during my time of purchasing my said art supplies, a woman walked into the store. I want to preface this by saying, here in the Chicago area, the heat index was about 110 degrees yesterday.  This woman, wearing her sleeveless, Ralph Lauren t-shirt dress, felt the need to also wear her pink, Ralph Lauren sweater tied around her shoulders to complete the outfit. Really? 110 DEGREES.  I get she was trying to make a statement. I think it was a stupid statement but I think the dress alone would've covered it.  Why on Earth would you wear the sweater tied over your shoulders???  Then again, why am I letting this bother me so much? I have no answer to any of these questions.

Enjoy the Silence?

No, not today. Not right now. It's just my new puppy, Bailey, and me at home right now. We've been home together, with no one else, for over 2 hours now. And, I'm losing my mind. She's been super. Ate her dinner, pooped outside on our little walk, we played and then she fell asleep in my lap. She finally flipped over to the floor and now, here I am. All by myself. And, truthfully, I hate it.

I've been "trapped" inside this house for the last several weeks, almost daily. Could've been worse; it could've been the whole 6 months. So, for that I am grateful. But, this last week is driving me insane. The clock seems to stand still....days have felt like weeks and it feels as if Wednesday is never going to get here. All I do is laundry and straighten up and sit on my laptop. (Oh, and wash dishes and load and unload the dishwasher several times a day.)

Both Andrew and Issac have games tonight that I am missing. Andrew is up in Highland Park; Issac is in Evanston. I got Andrew a ride to and from, so Steve took the little guys to watch Issac play. It was too hot and humid to take Bailey with to watch. She can't be in the heat for too long. And, she was still a little jumpy from this mornings storm so I didn't want to leave her alone. Steve just texted that he's going to take the boys to Poochies for dinner after the game. Guess I'll wait for Andrew to get home and we can decide to either eat whatever is here or order a pizza.

Nothing good is on TV. I already caught up on Keeping Up With the Kardashians.  All my other shows to watch are on the upstairs DVR and since Bailey isn't fully trained yet, I don't want her upstairs on the carpeting.  Nothing in the house looks good to eat. I just want out of here. The next 36 hours may kill me.

Pet Peeve

I have many pet peeves but, this past weekend, one of mine was in full light and it drove me crazy!!!!!!
Steve and I see a movie almost every weekend. (usually with our best friends, Tammy & Mike, but they were picking up their daughter from overnight camp) This pick was "Larry Crowne" with Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks. (a cute movie and I love both actors!) We always arrive at movies early so that we can get the seats we want, get snacks and get settled. I am also a fan of "The Twenty" which is 20 minutes worth of fun info and upcoming films. (This is before the actual movie previews, when the lights are dim.)

In our usual fashion, we arrived. Steve went get snacks and I went to get our seats. We always need an aisle. Steve sits in that aisle seat. I sit next to him. We like to be mid-way up in the stadium seating.  As I got to our theatre, there was a line already--a big line! The movie showing before ours began to let out. It looked like the nursing home let out their patients for an afternoon. They cleared out. (slowly) Then we all proceeded in. Steve had already met me in the line. We weren't able to sit in our usual section. We were a little further down than we normally like, but it was very crowded. The theatre filled in very quickly.  The lights dim, and suddenly another swarm of people pile in. Um...did you not check the movie times before you left the house??????? Do you think those of us who are already seated really enjoy you climbing over us? Do you think we enjoy you asking us if the seats next to us are taken while we are trying to watch previews?  Better yet, if there is one seat empty, do you think it's polite to ask those of us already situated to move down so you and your friend/spouse/date can sit in our aisle??? Do you think that when you stand at the bottom of the stairs and look up and see that all the seats are taken that by walking up the stairs 2 will magically open up or fall out of the sky? And, yelling down the stairs to where your friend/spouse/date is waiting is super annoying to the rest of us. More annoying---when that person yells back up the stairs. If you two want to talk, go outside! Here's an idea: planning to get to the theatre a little bit earlier. Then, you will get what you want.

A BOOM 4th of July

I hope everyone had a safe, fun filled holiday weekend. For the most part, we did. Saw a couple of movies, kids played in several baseball games, I worked a wedding, we saw (and played) with fireworks, and Simon broke a window. Typical weekend around here.

We really had no plans for the 4th of July. Jordan texted Saturday that he was holding his annual party at my parents house to eat and watch the fireworks. I originally had said we'd attend. Then, I started thinking that it would be all of Jordan and Jenna's friends AND all my BOOM co-workers (who I have missed so much!!!) and maybe bringing the kids wouldn't be the best idea. Jordan & Jenna both convinced me yesterday that we should just come anyway. And, Karolina was bringing her red velvet cupcakes---how could I pass those up?!?!

We arrived at the house (my parents were not home...they went to a different party) and all was calm. We sat around eating and just hanging out and it was very pleasant. I was so happy to see all of my friends from BOOM! I haven't seen them in weeks and it was so nice to be with everyone!! Someone found leftover fireworks and sparklers from last year's party in the garage and so everyone began to play. And, being that I am so NOT the mom of the year, I let all the boys play with them as well. They only held sparklers. And, they stood at a distance while all the grown ups lit the fireworks, but no one lost any limbs and fun was had by all.

The kids started to play catch in the backyard on the lawn and I warned them that it was a bad idea. But, as it always is, no one listened to me. Catch was going along just fine until we heard a giant BOOM. We thought it was a firework but, alas, it was not. It was my old bedroom window...shattered. Simon had thrown the ball at Andrew and it went over his head and oops....there went the window. I froze as I had never broken a window as a child. (I was a good kid.) None of us broke windows on the house as kids. (Then, Jordan reminded me that he and Lance had broken the kitchen window once. The garage window they broke 3 times. But, placing a basketball net right above the window may never have been the best idea. Now, that there are no kids living in that house, my parents had glass blocks installed.) Then, I started yelling at Simon. He just looked at me, calmly, (in true Simon fashion) and said that Andrew should have caught it.  True, but perhaps you SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN PLAYING IN THE YARD!!!!!!!!!!!  After some yelling, Simon finally began to cry. Steve, of course, comforted him by telling him it was an accident and no big deal. REALLY???????

I decided that I better text my father and let him know what happened. He was always the calmer one in these types of situations. He just asked how it happened and if it only shattered the storm window or did it go thru the house. So, I ran in to find that, no, it did not go thru the inside glass (PHEW!) it was just the storm window and screen.  I tell my dad that I will have the window replaced. He then texts back and asks if the glass fell and broke my mom's new plant. Clearly, he told her what had happened because I highly doubt he even knew that a plant existed under that window. I told him no glass fell; everything was trapped in the screen. Then, he asked if I yelled at Simon in front of everyone. Um, YES. I asked how pissed my mother was. He said she was upset that I yelled at Simon in front of everyone and embarrassed him. WTF???????????? She was NEVER worried about me being embarrassed in front of people when she would scream bloody murder at me! Normally, I would now go off on a tangent about Halloween 1989 (or was it 1988??), but I have sworn I would not repeat this story again. Just know that my mother never worried about my embarrassment.

The rest of the evening went along just fine. We saw various suburbs fireworks. But by 9:55pm, Morton Grove's STILL had not started and my kids had had it. So we left and saw a few fireworks as we drove home.  Sigh. Just another typical holiday. I start driving in 8 days......one of the first things on my list....sitting at my parents house while I have the window replaced.